When I say trauma I don’t mean any one major event that has festered inside me over the years. My trauma was gradual, a series of events and my subsequent emotional responses to them. Events that may not have been traumatic had someone else experienced them, but they were to me.
This. Everyone needs to understand this about trauma. Not all trauma is the same one-time violent incident that clearly marks one’s life with a ‘before event’ and ‘after event’ line of suffering. That kind of trauma is horrendous to deal with, of course. But this type of more subtle trauma is equally valid. It incapacitates just the same. Even when they don’t seem ‘that traumatic’ a set of circumstances from the outside, the pain is still real, the hurt is still valid.